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1. |
Numb
03:30
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A day will come when this’ll leave my mind, I take a thought for a day and leave it all behind.
We’re no different than we were before, at least to me I’d never keep the score.
So please tell me what is right to keep me from clinging tight.
What do you have to say? Just forget me ‘cause you can-
And if I mold or change will it all just fade to grey?
I’m holding on to what I know is reality.
I’ve lasted way too long just to break away.
Never wanted you to think it’s all your fault, never really cared about what you want.
My past slowly starts to creep, all my sanity it will keep.
So please tell me what is right to keep me from clinging tight.
What do you have to say? Just forget me ‘cause you can-
And if I mold or change will it all just fade to grey?
I’m holding on to what I know is reality.
I’ve lasted way too long just to break away.
Reality will fade away.
I’m barely alive and I’m numb on the inside, but I will survive- after all I think it’s safe to reside.
What do you have to say? Just forget me ‘cause you can-
And if I mold or change will it all just fade to grey?
I’m holding on to what I know is reality.
I’ve lasted way too long just to break away.
Reality will fade away.
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2. |
16 Yrs
02:55
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I’ve been feeling distant for the many things that I have caused.
Bitching to get outta here like a lost and lonely dog.
My body shakes with confusion, overcome by my mistakes.
I pray to god he will take me- if I take it back will it be too late?
I shouldn’t even try if I can’t erase it.
They try to feed me lies so I must erase them.
So fucking fed up with such blinding ignorance.
Force fed by your best interest.
Still you say that I need you every time
But all the times that I have tried, you only get further.
I’m not sure how I really feel, but all I think is never real.
You never spoke once, I would remember.
You were so caught up in the ember.
I desire fame and fortune, behind the lies are truths unspoken.
Still you say that I need you every time
But all the times that I have tried, you only get further.
Why do I, why don’t I believe?
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3. |
Still Alone
02:02
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The beauty of it all, doesn’t make sense.
The higher we are the easier I’m hit.
I try to stand tall but I’m playing defense.
You’re not who you are, you hide behind your lips.
And it’s okay to be open as I would do the same-
But it seems I’m under fire almost every fucking day.
There’s a method to the madness, I wish you’d understand.
The boy in his room has some bigger plans.
So much needed left to say.
Yet again my words melt away.
Lost in my head, it’s crazy and unfair.
Don’t try to pretend this thread won’t tear.
It’s true I still care about you,
but if our plans fall through-
There’ll be no one to blame but you.
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4. |
Broken Walls
04:20
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How can I believe you now?
You shattered my reality and truth would never set me free.
We are to live so lonely now.
We’re shadows of the desolate just waiting for the end to hit.
If you don’t, then you won’t have to think about it.
If you don’t, say you won’t- but I will have to.
When this all goes down I’ll be waiting for you just to close your eyes.
Then slowly won’t you open your eyes?
Finally look up and realize your walls have fallen down from the sky.
It didn’t have to be this way but the decision has been made up,
this time there’s no going back.
I’m sorry that i let you down, I didn’t mean to let you down.
I always try to fix it- just ends up the opposite.
I try to separate myself, isolation at its finest.
Try to focus on myself, it’s obvious i’m dying.
I try to lock away myself, isolation at its finest.
I can’t focus on myself, I’m really fucking trying.
If only I would open eyes.
Finally look up and realize your walls have fallen down from the sky
It didn’t have to be this way but my decision has been made up,
this time there’s no going back.
I’m sorry that i let you down, I didn’t mean to let you down.
I always try to fix it- just ends up the opposite.
I hate it, I love it, I hate that I love it, I love that I hate it.
I’m sorry that i let you down, I didn’t mean to let you down.
I always try to fix it- just ends up the opposite.
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5. |
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I Wonder What’s Happening at Hannah McDick’s?
We’re going to Hannah McDick’s house!
I have the party essentials let’s get wild.
Yeah, let’s start a party. The shots are starting!
Smoking blunts, and choking on cigarette smoke.
So hey, let’s take two more shots until our livers rot.
Let’s get fucking stoned, I cannot drive my way home-
I’m way too tipsy and extra crispy.
My mouth is so dry!
Oh yeah, I’m way too fucked up.
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6. |
Faith in Uncertainty
04:13
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Check came in, another shitty day at work.
Aching for a break, so I can smoke my pain away.
Smoke it all away.
It’s my last resort, in need of one’s support.
No time for depression, just a tasty Newport,
to get my mind off the things I go through.
I’m tired of living a life that is so screwed.
I’d rather not be tied to anything I have to prove.
It’s better to realize now before you take all the words from my mouth.
You say you wanna be friends but you’re gone before the night ends.
It’s sad I haven’t realized that you still carry the look in your eyes.
What am I to you? Another being just born to lose.
And I am not so satisfied but I will keep all advice in mind.
I can’t wait till we reach the end, it’s a long way so I’ll just pretend-
that everything is truly fine. I won’t look past the blatant lies.
Why do I try so hard to please you?
Never really wanted to be used.
How did I become so blind? Leave it, just to rot my mind.
The fucking hardest part is starting to break through.
What am I to you? Another being just born to lose.
And I am not so satisfied but I will keep all advice in mind.
I can’t wait till we reach the end, it’s a long way so I’ll just pretend-
that everything is truly fine. I won’t look past the blatant lies.
We all wanna be more than we are.
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7. |
Underwater!!!
06:47
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When I was younger, I used to take these feelings a lot harder.
Nowadays, I barely feel- I am underwater.
I lay awake again thinking of a getaway.
I’ve gotta get rid of my memory of feeling lost and gone, again.
So down with it all, down with myself. I can’t feel in this life.
This head on my shoulders is only a boulder, it’s a burden to keep up the lies.
I’m a zombie, the anomaly in every situation.
Emotions that changed me also came with lessons.
When I was younger, I used to take these feelings a lot harder.
Nowadays, I barely feel- I am underwater.
As the time moves on, my pain seems to grow.
Nostalgic memories replace my body whole.
It’s a big, bad world. We’re all stuck inside-
Meaningless conversations waiting just to die.
I’ve become so blind to what’s come after me, shrouded in apathy.
Your words, they only hurt when you stand next to me.
I feel I’m truly alone ‘cause nobody close will listen for me, they’ll misinform me.
I have nowhere to go so I keep it inside, until I explode, I’m getting close.
I’m slowly falling apart, so fragile I have become.
No longer have those feelings, that I had before- what have I become?
Misery behind a mask, I try to hide my eyes in black.
Underwater all the time, oh thanks to you, I died inside.
Walking dead, I’m like a zombie. It’s too late to apologize, don’t apologize.
It’s already killing me slowly, nothing but a casket to hold me.
It awaits before, it calls my name. I can hear it, I can no longer run away.
If you could understand, you would feel- but you don’t.
I don’t understand how to feel if you don’t.
Why do I feel myself angry inside? I hide everything from you.
Maybe you’re the reason why. Maybe you’re the reason I can’t feel.
It’s hard to say, but it could be real.
I numb the pain, I fade to black.
If it weren’t for you I’d fall off track.
Why do I still keep it inside?
I’m running from you. I’m running for my life.
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8. |
Bad Decisions
01:40
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We grew up when everybody asked us to stay young, we failed you for the last time.
I swear to god I will die this time.
When you look back on all your memories and fears I won’t be the only person here,
You must evacuate your fears.
The night you said you loved me, you lied, the night I decided to grow up and die
Was never quite as I expected it to be.
Nobody is my friend, everybody just wants my life to end- nobody is helping me.
And then I will die, you seem to feed me all your lies.
Everybody’s out to kill me, I have no friends I have no family.
And then I will die.
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9. |
Rule of Two
05:04
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Life’s different, my mind’s lifted. I feel trapped in my own life.
So different, like a misfit- tried to end it, lied can’t risk it.
So what I’m saying is I’m barely alive,
and all the dreams that I’ve conjured are stuck in my mind.
In-between stages but not adjacent.
I’m ready to cave in and just close my eyes.
I cave in. I fake it. Spread so thin. I caved in.
I bleed the doubts, when I reminisce about the lives, that starved for this.
The stars align, and they fade with time. We break away and the bastard dies.
I pay the price every time- ‘till I feel drained out.
It hurts to bleed where you lie and I just bled out.
We fade and fall, then we lose it all.
We’re running in circles with no-one to call.
We’re screaming in pain, you don’t know my name.
How can I forgive you? You don’t know my name.
This dream is a lie, I’ve lived and I’ve died.
There’s no-one to save me, I fell through the sky.
We still see your face, the laughter and shame.
I cannot forgive what you’ve taken away.
I feel like I’m so alive, life is great when I’m inside.
It’s hard to live my life, I struggle all the time, comprehending that I’m not a perfect man.
It sort of gets to me, ‘cause it’s hard to believe. That there’s truly any good for a guy like me.
It’s a tragedy, I can’t seem to get a grip on reality.
Don’t look for me, I erased myself from all the feelings that come after me.
We fade and fall, then we lose it all.
We’re running in circles with no-one to call.
We’re screaming in pain, you don’t know my name.
How can I forgive you? You don’t know my name.
This dream is a lie, I’ve lived and I’ve died.
There’s no-one to save me, I fell through the sky.
We still see your face, the laughter and shame.
I cannot forgive what you’ve taken away.
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10. |
Desolation
05:23
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Nothing was the same ever since I woke up.
I left your spoiled dreams and I sealed them shut.
I stayed away from you for a long, long time.
I guess I’m addicted to you.
No longer will I stay searching for you.
No longer will I try to be with you.
When misery takes its course, slowly die.
Everything I loved is leaving me behind.
You’re my poison, you’re my everything.
For my devotion, I’d give up anything.
I hear the ocean- I think I’m drowning here.
For my devotion, you cannot leave me here.
Come on a little closer now. Yeah, come on.
You’re my poison, you’re my everything.
For my devotion, I’d give up anything.
I hear the ocean- I think I’m drowning here.
For my devotion, I’d slit my wrists my dear.
You’re my temptation, the devil in my ear.
On my occasion, you’re only thriving here.
I’ll be waiting for you to be gone for good.
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